Monday, July 6, 2009

Midnight Musings

I have a couple stories on my mind tonight…

First story is from the Bible. Moses. Who doesn’t love this story? Moses rescued by Pharaoh’s own daughter, raised by her, in Pharaoh’s own house. Later, he had to confront Pharaoh – whom he must have personally known– commanding him to set all his slaves (and probably his livelihood) free. Talk about family issues… I can’t even imagine how difficult this would have been. And yet, even though Pharaoh said no, and no way, and not a chance… Moses didn’t give up. You know the rest of the story, Moses kept at it. Sure of himself that he was doing the Lord’s errand. He was doing the right thing. And eventually, the Israelites were freed. But still not without opposition, in the form of an ocean!! I don’t remember anywhere in the story where Moses doubted his duty or what he needed to do. He just did it. And when he hit a road block, he used his faith to call down the Powers of Heaven. It was as simple as that.

Second story is from the Book of Mormon. For those who aren’t familiar, this is a religious record of the people in the America’s… from long ago. One of the prophets in the Book of Mormon is named Nephi. It is his story I am thinking about tonight as well. Nephi and his family escape Jerusalem, his father being a prophet who was being sought by King Laban. Before they traveled over to the “Promised Land" (the Americas) God asks Nephi's father, Lehi, to send his sons back to get the sacred record kept by the king. Nephi readily agrees, because it is the right thing to do. His brothers? Not so much. In fact, they give Nephi quite a hard time about it. At one point nearly killing him. But Nephi never doubted what he was supposed to do. After one failed attempt, he thought of another plan. Then after that failed attempt, he thought of another. Until, on the third try, he did as the Lord had asked, and retrieved the sacred record.

So here is my question… my thought. How do these men NOT doubt what they are supposed to do? Granted, they were prophets and had a pretty clear connection to God, but still...

Bringing these scripture stories into my life, and applying them to my current circumstances, how do I get that kind of faith? The kind where I know, 110% what I need to be doing and nothing, no road block, will keep me from that.

Sure, there are some things that it is automatic for… defending my God, my family, my religion. Adhering to covenants I have made, etc.

But what about a choice between two good things. What about when you have made a heart wrenching decision to leave those you love and move with your family to a new home? When a road block comes, how do I not doubt myself? With any decision, for that matter, how do I not doubt myself?

I know a few things. And one, for sure, is that God is in charge of our lives. And another, is that He knows who I am and what I need. I just really wish I could see the big picture right now.

So, tonight, our new home sits in limbo. And I am trying to figure out in my mind, what on earth is going on. But there is a quiet feeling, deep in my heart, that gives me peace. The peace of knowing the Lord is in charge.

My all time favorite quote is from one of the Prophets of our church President Harold B. Lee: “By faith in God you can be attuned to the Infinite and by power and wisdom obtained from your Heavenly Father harness the powers of the universe to serve you in your hour of need in the solution of problems too great for your human strength or intelligence” (Church News, 15 Aug. 1970, p. 2).


Anonymous said...

I just gave a lesson that hit on some of this just this past Sunday. Finding faith through trails... I might post it actually...

waiting is so tough, but you show great faith, hang in there and hugs

Emmy said...

I don't know how we can get to that level other than seeing again and again His hand in our lives and that he does help us and watch over us.

Also when we get to the point in our lives where we realize we are completely dependent upon Him and cannot do it ourselves then you learn to trust more out of sheer necessity.

S'mee said...

Even Father Lehi groan and moaned when one favoured son broke his bow.
I think everyone has perfect faith in certain areas and lack thereof in others. Tithing, Sacrament attendance, not killing your children...stuff like that.

They tell us God's day is measured by 1000 of our years. I guess that means when He says "Hang on a sec, I'll be right there!" it could take a while; but in the long run He will be there.

Fiauna said...

Excellent question, Kathy. And a situation I can readily relate to. All I can offer you is something you already know: Prayer, prayer, prayer. If you feel at peace, then that's all you can ask for, right?

Huston Family said...

I remember you going through this with the last house you were looking at! I'm so sorry you're going through it again. It's so easy to second guess decisions when a curve ball is thrown our way. I hope things work out for you in your new home, but would LOVE for your family to stay put if that's what happens. We all love you so much!

Our Crazy Family said...

I hope things work out for you! I started to freak out the day we closed on our house--like seriously I almost didn't go to sign the papers. Even though I love the house and it was a great deal--I just started to freak about taking my kids out of another ward, and another school. I am still a little sad about leaving a place that I loved, but there are super nice people in this new ward too, and I know that we have many adventures ahead of us. Life has twists and turns--we just have to remember to enjoy the journey--wherever it leads us! Hang in there--the Lord knows what he is doing!

Square Root of Family said...

God moves in a mysterious way
His wonders to perform;
He plants His footsteps in the sea
And rides upon the storm.

Deep in unfathomable mines
Of never failing skill
He treasures up His bright designs
And works His sov’reign will.

Ye fearful saints, fresh courage take;
The clouds ye so much dread
Are big with mercy and shall break
In blessings on your head.

Judge not the Lord by feeble sense,
But trust Him for His grace;
Behind a frowning providence
He hides a smiling face.

His purposes will ripen fast,
Unfolding every hour;
The bud may have a bitter taste,
But sweet will be the flower.

Blind unbelief is sure to err
And scan His work in vain;
God is His own interpreter,
And He will make it plain.

William Cowper

pan x 8 said...

Thank you for sharing such a devoted testimony. I struggled at first with scripture reading with our children because they are younger but still able to understand. I am so thankful for the stories of faith that we read page after page. And for the Spirit that testifies to them they can have and exercise faith even in their young years. So when they face bigger road blocks when they are older and more experienced, they will not hesitate such as Moses and Nephi.